Here in Canada is National "Take your child to work day". I've heard about it before... had some people talk about it... but have never participated in it. Well Blake is now in Grade 9 this year and his school did participate in this activity... and I am so glad he did.
For those of you who have teenagers... or been through the teenage years... I'm sure you can relate that it is a roller coaster of a ride. Blake is a good kid. He is my oldest and I gotta tell you I miss him like crazy! Sometime over the last year he went from being a part of this family to being a tenant in our home. Again I'm sure that those of you with teenagers can understand that I say this with the most love possible. I understand why he is breaking away from us... I understand that his hormones are out of whack and this is a trying and confusing stage in his life... I understand that Mom and Dad are lame... I understand that friends are his life right now... I understand all of this... But I still don't like it... But I accept it.
Its been a gradual process that looking back I don't really know when it started. All I know is somewhere along the way - my kid who used to sit and watch tv with us, want to come and sit and hang with us, laugh with us, and just basically BE with us... well he left and went out with his friends. Coming home to eat, grab some money and change his clothes... oh and to sleep too! LOL!
I do have to admit though that the dynamics of the family have changed as well. Many hours are spent with our youngest during the summer months - between baseball and football - what started as almost 7 days a week - has dwindled down to 4 times a week for the last 3 months. It is still hard and we make a constant effort to include Blake in other things as to not show any unfairness.
We do the best we can to engage ourselves in Blake's life - to make CERTAIN that he is included in family activities, and to let him have this wonderful time in his life to explore and find out who he is and what his interests are. I've been really pressing my husband to spend some time with him.... to do something with him... I did not want him to feel left out... although to be honest I think it is more me feeling left out of his life than him feeling left out of ours. My DH has been trying... but again... right now we are lame with a capital L to him... so he would much rather hang with anyone than us LOL!
OK so getting on with my story... as I said today was TYCTWD here. As most of you know my DH and I own a custom cabinet shop (mostly high end Custom Kitchens and Vanity's) so this is where he spent his day. He has been taking Tech at school and to our delight and surprise he absolutely loves it and has so far been getting in the high 90's in this course. Now I know some of you may be thinking - TECH??? your happy about that? Not Math? Physics? Computer Programming? And to that I will say YES!! I will support my children in anything that they want to do in their life... and if he loves working with wood - than good for him... life is about being happy... and money doesn't always buy happiness. I do realize times have changed and education is important - but it is NOT the be all and end all of our existence. Trades are a great way to make a career for yourself.. just remember that next time you call your local plumber or electrician and they charge you 50 - 75 dollars per hour for their services!! (K sorry I will come down from my soap box now tee hee)
Well he was going to shadow both me and my husband today - to give him a feel for what we both do. Up until now he has shown absolutely NO interest in the business at all. Absolutely NO interest is building, renovating, tools or anything remotely even close to the business at all. Well my youngest is still off school with the flu - so he went to work with DH all day. Uncertain if he would make the 6:00 am alarm until 5 in the afternoon - I was worried all day. Would the employees know what to do with him. He does have some history that makes most people read him differently than what is really there. My mom worry kicked into high gear - my baby - working all day - with saws, and tools ACK!!
So last night before bed - he came downstairs and told me how excited he was about today. He then admitted to me that he is really nervous as well - and that he doesn't want to look silly. When I reassured him that everything was going to be all right - his excitement was so evident this morning! Where is this excitement when I wake you up for school every morning I wondered as he got himself dressed for the day?
Being the good mom I am - I only checked in on my boys 2 (ok maybe 3) times during the day. My husband sounded so proud of him. Said he was picking up everything so great, really working hard and showing some interest. I had to wonder if he was talking about the same Blake that was living with us currently? You know the one that takes arguing for three hours to get him to clean his room? That one?
He was kept busy by the employees doing some sanding... he stained some doors in the booth... he helped edge band some pieces.. swept... went on a sales call with DH to take final measurements... helped wrap up a kitchen going out for delivery tomorrow.. went to our local door supplier for a pick up with his dad and helped out with some general office duties. All in all it was a really full day.
At around 5 o'clock the door flew open and he came running down stairs... with a smile so big on his face it made my heart skip a beat. He was so excited... he was beaming with pride. He was my old Blake... the one that I thought I wouldn't see again for at at least 10 years. The one I thought disappeared when his hormones took over his body. I sat and listened to a detailed report of his day. He spoke more to me than he has in the last week in total. I was so happy for him. I was so happy for me. I was so happy for my husband... who I know had a better time with him. He has missed him as much as I have.
Tonight we were sitting watching tv and I hear him get up off of the computer and come downstairs. He doesn't sit in the chair all to himself - instead he comes and sits beside me and puts his head on my shoulder. I don't think he realized that I sat there kissing his hair for the entire episode of the show. God how I missed these moments. How I missed my little boy. I know these moments are few and far between.. but I am thankful just to know that yes - things are OK. He is going to be OK.
And tonight when he came downstairs to say goodnight while I sit here - he asked me if he could start working for the shop on weekends. He said he had so much fun with Daddy (yup stills calls him that) and he wishes he didn't have to go to school tomorrow and wants to go to work instead!!
Maybe we should start looking at a new home for our business when our lease is due...it looks like we may just have someone interested in taking the business over one day. You never know... a parent can dream!
Lori